Thursday, September 22, 2011
Starting this created memories
As I was writing this last night so many memories came flooding back to me. It all seems so far away now and it almost feels sometimes that it happened to a different person. I could not imagine that happening to the woman I am today. As I sat here typing last night I remembered the first argument, the first flash of shock, the first wave of pain, the first sight of blood, the first hospital visit. I lost three front teeth, had a fractured jaw, and a total of ten stitches on both lips; all from one punch, right to the mouth. It was then that the lies began. Lies to my family, my friends, my coworkers and more importantly, to myself. He cried that next night when I was released from the hospital, laying in our bed, sobbing as I had never seen a man sob. He didn't know what came over him, he was so, so, sorry!!! He would take care of me. Begged me not to leave him. I thought I MUST have done something, anything! to provoke that type of reaction, that anger, that violence! It just HAD to be me!! He was so loving at other times, flowers, walks in the park, holding hands, talking through the night. What had become of the man I fell in love with? What had I done to HIM?
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
You have touched my heart. Your open honesty about painful experiences brings tears to my eyes. I've been abused and stalked before and I know the fear that you must have lived with. Thank you for sharing and opening up your inner most wounds. Writing your story will help others, some to understand what they've never experienced and others to accept the reality of what is happening to them. For them, your story might be a life saver, mobilizing them to become a survivor too.
ReplyDelete